Letter To a Girl Boss No.8 from Michela Cassar of No BS Advice

moving letter from Michela to her 19 year old self, reminding you that 'comparison is an act of violence against the self’ and that your dream is what makes you unique and your courage to pursue it is what makes you a girl boss not to be messed with.

Welcome to our series “Letters To A Girl Boss”. This series is all about bringing a little bit of inspiration and happiness to the every day boss. Sometimes we just need a friend to give us a little pep talk, to boost our confidence and let us tackle the day.

If you’d like to join in and submit a letter of your own in order to inspire a fellow girl boss, you can find more about it here and you can submit your letter to: sarahs@creativeandcoffee.com

Letter No.1 from graphic designer Maru

Letter No.2 from brand strategist Rachel 

Letter No.3 from Divine Connector Steph Lagana

Letter No.4 from The Random Passion Project Founder Ieva 

Letter No.5 from life and clarity coach Laura Weldy

Letter No.6 from finance expert Vangile 

Letter No.7 from Hannele Hyyppä of the Poetry of Dazzling Life



To my 19-year-old self, sitting in a lecture hall feeling so alone…


I have two lessons that I want to share with you..


  1. I know it’s tough, but it’s going to be ok.


I know that you’re feeling lost right now.


I know that you’ve never felt so alone and only have yourself to turn to, but I want you to know that this is going to make you one of the strongest people you’ll ever know.


I want you to know that each and every struggle you’re going through is happening for a reason. Your struggles are the things that are going to give you the strength to pursue your wildest dreams.


Your struggles are the things that are going to give you the strength to pursue your wildest dreamsClick To Tweet


Now, you know I like to keep it real with you, when we’re having our deep morning conversations in the mirror sometimes. I want to make it clear that it’s not going to be all butterflies and unicorn sprinkles (ok…can someone make that a thing?)


Yes, you’re going to have days when you’ll want to give up, call it quits and you’ll try and convince yourself that working as a lawyer won’t be too bad. You’re also going to have to continuously dodge that ‘so what are you up to?’ question at family gatherings and you’re going to have a few nights on your bedroom floor, crying your eyes out with a few tubes of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream, but it’s going to be ok.


Your determination to go against the grain and create the life that you want will not only fill you with a sense of accomplishment, but It will also lead you to help others do the same.



  1. Stop looking for validation to chase your dream.


My second lesson for you is that, I want you to stop looking at others for validation to pursue YOUR dream. I want you to stop looking at your peers and feeling as though you’re ‘weird’ for not having figured out what you want to do with your life. I want you to stop doubting your ability to achieve your dream just because you don’t have a ‘ten year-this- is –how- my- life -is -going –to- go- color- coded –life-plan’ drawn out, like everybody else.


I want you and anyone else who’s reading this to remember that you don’t have to be;


  • The popular kid with tons of friends,
  • The kid who gets invited to all the cool parties,
  • The kid whose parents are so and so,
  • The kid with a trust fund or
  • The kid getting straight A’s at school


To achieve YOUR dreams.


Remember the wise words of Iyanla Vanzant:


‘Comparison is an act of violence against the self’


You don’t need any ‘special’ qualities that you’ve falsely attached to achieve your dream.



The only things you need to make your dream come true are;


  • A little stubbornness.
  • Unlimited amounts of coffee.
  • A dash of grit.
  • And belief in yourself.


Your dream is what makes you unique and your courage to pursue it is what makes you a girl boss not to be messed with.


You’re an uncommon breed and don’t you ever forget that.


Just keep going,




Ps. Each struggle that you go through is going to make some great speech material one day. Nobody gets inspired with an overnight success kind of story.





Letters to Girl Boss Michela

Proud coffee-aholic, Michela Cassar is an online creative who enjoys helping bloggers up their design skills and grow their email lists one coffee at a time.

Wanting to have complete creative freedom and combine her passion for helping others. She decided to create her own platform, which offers straight to the point advice on how to do just that.

You can find Michela’s internet home over at her website here.


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